Hal, please read:
"The Female World of Love and Ritual: Relations between Women in
Nineteenth-Century America" by Carroll Smith-Rosenberg in the anthology
Scott, Joan Wallach. FEMINISM AND HISTORY. Oxford Readings in Feminism. New
York: Oxford UP, 1996, 366-397.
Wes is right about reading 19thC language through a 20thC lens.
There may be more recent scholarship than this article, I've been out of
the loop for a little while.
Kathy Farretta
Flagstaff, AZ 86001