There are a number of references to George Washington in Twain's
anti-imperialist writings. In "To the Person Sitting in Darkness" he is part
of the "Trinity of our national gods" -- "Washington, the Sword of the
Liberator; Lincoln the Slave's Broken Chains; the Master [McKinley], the
Chains Repaired."

To the Person Sitting in Darkness
http://www.boondocksnet.com/ai/twain/persit.html

"A Defence of General Funston" begins, "February 22. To-day is the
great Birth-Day.... Neither Washington nor Funston was made in a day."
Washington figures prominently in the essay.

A Defence of General Funston
http://www.boondocksnet.com/ai/twain/deffunst.html

The "Shade of Washington" appears in "The Stupendous Procession,"
where he has a discussion with "The Frivolous Stranger" about why
Filipinos are labeled "rebels" and Puerto Ricans are labeled "subjects".
"Shade of Washington -- not pleased. 'A degrading term, and apes
monarchy.'"

"George Wishington" is discussed in "The Secret History of Eddypus,
the World-Empire." History has been suppressed so Washington's name
is not remembered correctly. "He did not write the Declaration [of
Independence], as some historians erroneously believe, but excused
himself on the plea that he could not tell a lie." And later: "Wishington
did not live to see his prophecy come true, but in time it did come true,
and the government thenceforth made the sly and treacherous betrayal
of weak republics its amusement, and the stealing of their lands and the
assassination of their liberties its trade."

There are also many other references to the Declaration of
Independence. The most notable is the suggestion in "The Stupendous
Procession" that it be revised to reflect government of the new colonies:
"ALL WHITE MEN ARE BORN FREE AND EQUAL" and
"GOVERNMENTS DERIVE THEIR JUST POWERS FROM THE
CONSENT OF THE GOVERNED WHITE MEN." (caps in original)

"The Stupendous Procession" and "The Secret History of Eddypus"
were first published in John S. Tuckey, ed., _Mark Twain's Fables of
Man_ (Berkeley: Univ. of California Press, 1972).

Jim Zwick
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Date:         Tue, 3 Apr 2007 11:56:10 -0700
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Sender:       Mark Twain Forum <[log in to unmask]>
From:         Dick Ford <[log in to unmask]>
Subject:      Re: TWAIN ON JEFFERSON
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These instances of "Thomas Jefferson" appear in the gutenberg complete text
of
Mark Twain:

From Innocents Abroad:
On the 12th of
August, 1860, two months before the Waite and Granger affair, two South
Carolina clergymen, named John H. Morgan and Winthrop L.  Willis, one a
Methodist and the other an Old School Baptist, disguised themselves, and
went at midnight to the house of a planter named Thompson--Archibald F.
Thompson, Vice President under Thomas Jefferson,--and took thence, at
midnight, his widowed aunt, (a Northern woman,) and her adopted child, an
orphan--named Mortimer Highie, afflicted with epilepsy and suffering at
the time from white swelling on one of his legs, and compelled to walk on
crutches in consequence; and the two ministers, in spite of the pleadings
of the victims, dragged them to the bush, tarred and feathered them, and
afterward burned them at the stake in the city of Charleston.

From the (Burlesque) Autobiography:

Col. Sellers knew the President very well, and had access to his presence
when officials were kept cooling their heels in the Waiting-room.  The
President liked to hear the Colonel talk, his voluble ease was a
refreshment after the decorous dullness of men who only talked business
and government, and everlastingly expounded their notions of justice and
the distribution of patronage.  The Colonel was as much a lover of
farming and of horses as Thomas Jefferson was.  He talked to the
President by the hour about his magnificent stud, and his plantation at
Hawkeye, a kind of principality--he represented it.  He urged the
President to pay him a visit during the recess, and see his stock farm.

"The President's table is well enough," he used to say, to the loafers
who gathered about him at Willard's, "well enough for a man on a salary,
but God bless my soul, I should like him to see a little old-fashioned
hospitality--open house, you know.  A person seeing me at home might
think I paid no attention to what was in the house, just let things flow
in and out.  He'd be mistaken.  What I look to is quality, sir.  The
President has variety enough, but the quality!  Vegetables of course you
can't expect here.  I'm very particular about mine.  Take celery, now
--there's only one spot in this country where celery will grow.  But I an
surprised about the wines.  I should think they were manufactured in the
New York Custom House.  I must send the President some from my cellar.
I was really mortified the other day at dinner to see Blacque Bey leave
his standing in the glasses."


Now, Colonel, can you picture
Jefferson, or Washington or John Adams franking their wardrobes through
the mails and adding the facetious idea of making the government
responsible for the cargo for the sum of one dollar and five cents?
Statesmen were dull creatures in those days.

From The Tone-Imparting Committee:
I can recollect that first time I ever saw them
on the platforms just as well as I can remember the events of yesterday.
Horace Greeley sat on the right, Peter Cooper on the left, and Thomas
Jefferson, Red Jacket, Benjamin Franklin, and John Hancock sat between
them.


---
Be kind. Be of good cheer.

Dick Ford