Pat Ober has won #2 (Pat also qualified for #1, but was a few hours late) 

#3 is still unclaimed, and requires just 3 memberships/subscriptions and 3 puns.

A word about "puns." I actually have a list of nine or ten bits of word-play, but only asked for the four "truly terrible" puns, and some of these might not be considered purely puns, but could be called cheeky conceits, one-word riffs, or twisted literary allusions, or sick little double entendres. Maybe trope-a-dopes, if contestants were slugging it out in a ring. They stick out like sore thumbs (which is like a simile, like, you know).

Kevin
@
Mac Donnell Rare Books
9307 Glenlake Drive
Austin TX 78730
512-345-4139
Member: ABAA, ILAB
*************************
You may browse our books at 
www.macdonnellrarebooks.com