Dennis

I hope you don't mind that I'm replying to you directly on this. And it
isn't because I don't want these comments on the list serv - I just think
the issue is not going anywhere and the accusatory nature of them is NOT
productive.

Here's my main issue:

Why do you assume that because people object to your tone that they are
"guilty" of something? You've turned a discussion about the tone used into a
healthy lifestyles approach vs. social justice approach to health promotion.
This has absolutely nothing to do with your views - I don't disagree at ALL
that there are many different ways to address tobacco use and that
addressing poverty would be the best approach. I agree with this.

What I disagreed with was your tone in your response - not the original, but
your subsequent response alluding to the suggeston that those who disagree
with you are somehow less worthy of an opinion because you assume they are
middle class, SUV driving... whatever (if you would like me to find it, I
can dig it out of my delete bin). What if I told you I was a single mother
who pulled myself up from the bootstraps, lived in assisted housing for
years and came into health promotion when my CAS worker asked me to join a
support group for battered women? Would that change your opinion of my
comments?

When I read your email, I didn't disagree with you, I just felt horrible for
the individual (who I don't know) who was being berated by someone -
especially someone who is so well respected. My own personal concern over
yours - and others - responses has kept me from posting to this list serv in
the past - and will continue to in the future. Does that make me insecure /
silly / irrational? Perhaps. But if you want to build rapport, community and
draw more folks into doing good work in this important business, its usually
not a good idea to shoot those who are seeking information / advice. There's
nothing wrong with being the one who is tilting at windmills, but there is
something wrong with stomping on people while you're doing it.

I don't want you to stop challenging Dennis, I just thought it's a good idea
to do so in a way that isn't stigmatizing and divisive.

All the best,

Annamaria Feltracco
----- Original Message -----
From: "Dennis Raphael" <[log in to unmask]>
To: <[log in to unmask]>
Sent: Thursday, February 06, 2003 9:19 AM
Subject: I'm Innocent!


> Vini, I went back to my original message -- below --.  You're right!
> It wasn't rude at all! Although I started to believe it from all the
responses
> it elicited!
>
> Do some people feel "guilty" about something?
>
> ------------------------------------
>
> >I strongly object to this strategy.
>
> >First of all it is not child care's role to turn children against their
parents
> or relatives who may be smokers.
>
> >Secondly, childcare should not be a place where children become exposed
to
> politicized messages.  If my kid came home from childcare singing
anti-smoking
> songs the childcare would hear about it.
>
> >Thirdly, our family does not smoke!
>
> >Give these kids a break!!!
>
> dennis raphael
> ---------------------------
>
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